Jacob's Well

"...finally we find him sitting in the entrance of his cave of disillusionment, his cave of spiritual retirement in his religious mountain..." (Briscoe speaks of Elijah, in There's a Snake in My Garden, p. 118.)  Herein I find my greatest inspiration to remain authentic in this journal, to address any abridgements with deep prayer.  Originally, it was to be a marathon read-through in some sparse little room at some retreat center.  Everyone from Philip Yancey to Trappist monks say such a retreat into solitude is a good thing, and indeed it is; but such was not Your plan for me with this project.  I would be too much like Briscoe's prophet.  Onward instead...


November 26, 2002
As I read Oswald Chambers this morning, I'm reflecting on one particular idea he considers: am I working to build the Body of Christ, or am I looking for personal development?  Self-focus leads to distortion.  Even more pertinent, am I concerned about "realizing Jesus Christ" or only about "realizing what He has done for me."

As I deal with this question of whether You're calling me to ministry--I think again of the woman at the well.  Jesus connected with her, showed His delightful renewal for her, even in the face of her wanton cooperation with the pain and badness all around her.  Nonetheless, she became a powerful evangelist...immediately.  The whole town came out to see Him on her word. Her impact did not come later, after she'd had much training in apologetics or in the exegesis of His living words, not after she'd stood the test of time.  Her ministry was nothing like that of the disciples, yet it was effective. 

I see now why the reflections on Elijah's life served as my prelude today. You're beginning to make a linking me in with in the prep work, aren't You, God?  It is so easy to look at a task--and the more thorough the divine revelation before the task--a common occurrence for prophets, the greater the temptation to over-prepare so much that the time for action never arrives.  To quote an old Quaker proverb, it is tempting to be one who is always digging worms but never takes them on a fishing trip.

God, if it is time...take me fishing.  Even me, the unprepared untrained who has nothing to recommend me but our time together at Jacob's Well.